Nakuul Mehta shares 5 toxic things parents should ‘never ever’ say to their children: From ‘nangu-pangu’ to ‘be a good girl’

March 22, 2026 - 14:15

Everyday words used at home can quietly shape a child’s emotional intelligence, confidence, and boundaries. Experts are highlighting several common yet toxic phrases that parents should consciously remove from their vocabulary to nurture a more positive and secure environment.

A key area of concern is the use of dismissive or shaming language. Terms like "nangu-pangu" or "don’t be a crybaby" invalidate a child’s feelings, teaching them to suppress emotions rather than understand and communicate them. Similarly, gender-biased directives such as "be a good girl" or "boys don’t cry" enforce restrictive stereotypes, limiting emotional expression and personal growth.

Comparisons to siblings or peers with phrases like "why can’t you be more like..." are particularly damaging, eroding self-esteem and fostering resentment. Conditional praise, where affection is tied to achievements, can make a child feel loved only when they succeed, creating a foundation for anxiety. Finally, absolute labels like "you are so lazy" or "you are selfish" define a child by a momentary behavior, potentially cementing a negative self-image.

The consensus is clear: moving from criticism to curiosity, and from labeling to understanding specific behaviors, allows children to develop a stronger sense of self-worth and healthier emotional resilience. The power of mindful communication is a cornerstone of supportive parenting.